People think about things more abstractly when they perceive that they're further away in time or space (e.g. see earlier). In terms of negotiations, thinking more abstractly is beneficial because it encourages negotiators to reflect on and express their underlying motives and priorities.(...)

Our blind spots! lets help each other

I need you to point out my mistake because no matter how much I look with skepticism or doubt I cannot see my mistakes,especially the ones I am standing on.This is why it is advised to the doctors to get  treatment from another doctor.Although we know ourselves more than the other person but we don't get the full picture,we are too focused on small things and cannot see what we look in a bigger picture.And in science its the bigger picture or as they say effective theory that matters.You cannot do justice to a phenomenon  by  just looking at the molecular level and not including the macro level.

So, I will keep my heart open, it is difficult for me see every detail, you can help  me see things by enlarging them in way that impacts my emotions.

Because when we are attached to a certain belief or we put a label on ourselves we start creating  a new version of ourselves and assimilating information according that new identity. We ignore information that does not match with our core beliefs.

You would be saying that this a disadvantage of being religious or sticking with beliefs, than I ask who isn't having beliefs.Belief of having doubt in every thing ,belief that religion is a dangerous and a mess-creating-thing.

A person believing that religion is really destructive will have a fully charged version of accusatory rhetoric, while completely ignoring the things supporting the religion or even if not ignoring, rationalizing to bypass it.
Political desonance: this article cites empirical evidence with a crisp interpretation.

P.s: this idea was simmering in my mind when I hit upon this article,assimilated the best to make up my story

Illusion of security

Every thing seems good until the earth starts moving beneath your feet and than you realize how powerless you are and how weak are the foundations you are standing on!
Systems work when the resources are abundant but when the resources becomes scarce even the best of systems will crumble even the best marvels of engineering will fall.Even the biggest boats will sink.

A solution for Peace

How can I love some body who has ideals and goals of life so different for me.Either I can love that person or achieve my goal.I cannot have the cake and eat it too. Love for all is not a workable solution.
But compassion for all is a workable one.Karenarm strong illustrates wonderfully in a Ted talk.

''But I'd just like to quote, finish at the end with a reference to a British author, an Oxford author whom I don't quote very often, C.S. Lewis. But he wrote one thing that stuck in my mind ever since I read it when I was a schoolgirl. It's in his book The Four Loves. He said that, he distinguished between erotic love, when two people gaze, spellbound, into each other's eyes. And then he compared that to friendship. When two people stand side by side, as it were, shoulder to shoulder, with their eyes fixed on a common goal.

We don't have to fall in love with each other, but we can become friends. And I am convinced. I felt it very strongly during our little deliberations at Vevey, that when people of all different persuasions come together, working side by side for a common goal, differences melt away. And we learn amity. And we learn to live together and to get to know one another.''

Can a healer kill a Hitler

situation:
A mass murderer that plans to kill further comes to a doctor.(house season 6;the tyrant)
a)should the doctor treat him?
b)The doctor concedes to treat but plans to kill the patient by intentionally committing the mistake: is this right?

The person on getting healthier is going to kill a big number of people and inflicting a great pain on humanity.Although it might be against the law or risk the doctors life.
The other opinion is this that doctor should do his job and leave the job of dealing with murderer to the people it belongs to.
My opinion is that the doctor should refuse to take this case outright and if he concedes to treat, he should treat honestly. Although it would be best to kill the psychopath but its not the duty of a doctor.

Time's healing power

Some times things become so locked and intricate that no solution seems possible.This thing is especially true in terms of personal relations.But as the time moves on these seemingly impossible knots soothe out automatically.And what was a big problem seems insignificant

Demonizing the Enemy

One way to maintain strong cohesion within a group is to portray anyone outside the group as evil. Hoffer argued in The True Believer (1951) that radical movements are energized by hatred for their enemies.

What did Eric Hoffer say about belief in "devils" outside the group?

Mass movements can rise and spread without belief in a God, but never without belief in a devil. Usually the strength of a mass movement is proportionate to the vividness and tangibility of its devil.

Like an ideal deity, an ideal devil is omnipotent and omnipresent. When Hitler was asked whether he was not attributing rather too much importance to the Jews, he exclaimed: "No, no, no!...It is impossible to exaggerate the formidable quality of the Jew as an enemy." Every difficulty and failure within the movement is the work of the devil, and every success is a triumph over his evil plotting

   

(source)

Free media vs government funded media

Participated in a debate on free media.Following are the arguments

The proponents said:

1) Private media competes for viewer ship .Viewers are looking for truth and so the competition promotes search for truth.

2) Private media is free from the pressure of government and has greater funding than the government run media.

3) Government funded media cannot speak against it and is less likely to speak the truth when it comes to revealing inequities of the government . It is more likely to promote government’s propaganda and facts that go against it.

My arguments for the sake of opposition

1)Although public is in search for truth but it likes drama because it intrigues them. So private T.V channel have sensationalizing and dramatization as their priority. So instead of truth they compete for breaking sensational news, certification is not in their priority. They forget the issue after it has cashed the money and start looking for more entertaining news.Take for example the issue of floods.

Truth needs time and commitment to search which only a fund stable media can afford. BBC is a perfect example. It is funded by government and is considered as a foremost authority in broadcasting.

2) Private media is more profit oriented so although it can say anything but governments can bribe them and also they cannot propagate an agenda that goes against its stakeholders and sponsors. The funding it gets has ropes tied with to it leaving the greater amount with no advantage

3) This argument seems valid if you talk about a country like Pakistan. But in country which is democratic and institutions of the state are firmly established and media is just funded rather than being operated by the state, these things are less likely to happen.

But the truth is:

Freedom is a thing that has no parallel. Truth is always relative to the observer. Killing the private media will kill the diversity and many facets of the truth will remain out of the sight of people. We will have an unchallengeable version of truth. Private media breaks this monopoly. If government is able to terrorize or bribe a few journalists there will be many who will say what they see and feel and will take stand on it.

No matter how just a government is or how powerful the institutions may become, state run media always has potential of being exploited. BBC might be the foremost authority but I have never heard it saying anything against the royal family or actively campaigning against the British government. But this deficiency is fulfilled by the private media of Britain. And its also true that BBC presents one of the best education and research programs.

Both private and government funded media are complementary to each other and fulfil the deficiencies left by each other. It also illustrates the philosophical stance that there is no black and white forms of morality.

 On various occasions examples of responsibilities of Pakistani media were quoted by opposition which I think are inappropriate in th  Pakistan highly normal things have tendencies to go awry.

 Our media has got freedom for which it wasn’t prepared. It is just a reflection of our society, which also couldn’t learn to use the freedom it got in a productive manner.

Psychology from the week

*''One of the things you do find cross-culturally is that children are particularly affected by and easily influenced by the threat of punishment from supernatural agents. This is a behavior regulation device, a control mechanism to prevent children from doing things we don't want them to do when they think we're not watching.

It's an additional mechanism on top of self-control that would prevent them from doing things that would ultimately cause them problems or their parents problems........''

**You might have thought it before doing a thing you considered wrong;'' well after all who can understand better than God''.The writer is explaining some helpful evolutionary inconsistencies in committing a sin 

''When people are basically convinced that God is on their side and God understands why they're doing what they're doing, there are lots of loopholes psychologically that also work alongside reproductive interests.''

(Times)

***I  found these lines from a book of psychology

''Children tend to go to their mothers for emotional comfort and to their fathers for playing''

MY inference:

This fact how some how define roles of parents.A father helps increase the creativity and IQ of the child while EQ of the child is determined by the mother.The stronger the bond is with the mother ,more stable is child emotionally. 

Gifted childern

 By far the majority of studies of the gifted and talented have found them to be emotionally stronger than others, with higher productivity, higher motivation and drive, and lower levels of anxiety. Indeed, high level creativity, in particular, requires real strength of character to overcome the forces of conventionality and the sneers of those who do not understand.

How to spot a clever toddler
Here are the important things an adult can do for a bright child. The old physical milestones of when a child first sits up, crawls, stands up, or walks, are no longer seen as firm pointers to future intellectual  potential, but they are excellent indicators. Gifted children are just as different from one another as any other group of children - some may be lively, into everything and very friendly, while others can be shy and prefer to keep to themselves. Here are four strong clues.
Lively minds:
The most noticeable feature of gifted children is the liveliness of their minds. This
comes across in many ways, especially in their delight with words. Even as toddlers
they’re usually very quick to spot tiny differences and catch on to unusual
associations between ideas.

Awareness:
Gifted little ones use their radar brains to seek and absorb information, sometimes
catching your meaning before you’ve reached the end of your sentence. They copy
other people’s behaviour and learn fast from the experience. Sometimes they seem
quite grown-up, but genuine maturity will come later.
Ability to learn:
A keen appetite for learning marks out the gifted, so that when they’re given the
chance they grab it. As they get older, their knowledge often becomes wider and
deeper than that of other children of the same age so they seem to be even more
intelligent. Parents wonder where clever children get all their knowledge from; they
seem to absorb it from everywhere - television, people’s conversations – the air!
Independence:
The clever toddler takes pride in what they can do. Even in their first few days at
proper school, they’re usually outstandingly independent and competent, though some
get a shock when they find all the others working at a very much lower level. Some
develop special interests even at nursery school, though these might change. By the
time they reach primary school, they may be really beginning to know their way
around a subject.
(excerpts from articles of joan freeman ,a psychologist researching on gifted childern)

emotion greater than love:Bandagi

Love is a higher cognitive emotion,its basic emotional component is attraction.In what ever way you define it this basic character would be there.
Like love there is still a higher cognitive emotion for which I cannot find a word in English that truly reflects its  connotations and that is  "Bandagi"(servitude).Its is an extreme form of love in which you give yourself completely to the other being.
You can love many but there is only one person you give your heart to,whose beauty you praise above all,for whom you will change yourself,in whom you forget yourself and give your free will to.You become one and inseparable.
Some people have this emotion for God , some for an other human being,some have it for a particular philosophy or an activity for example  science or service of humanity.
But I think care should be taken before taking such a step because once you are in there is no question of using rationale, you have already given up yourself and that thing is going to change yourself.It will define what you will become : either a blessing or a curse for humanity.

Pakistan's Neoconservatism

 The average Pakistani takes his religion seriously and wishes to see it in the public domain. But, unlike the Taliban, he does not want to make it claustrophobic for other people.
 The average Pakistani thus wants to look progressive in a conservative framework.
He is caught between two competing narratives: the first one, which is primarily grounded in religion and is now championed by militant groups, makes him want to see his religion triumph; the other, usually trotted out by the government and the media, is mostly based on information and rational analysis, making him realize the significance of progressing in the world.
(Radicalization in Pakistan:Understanding the Phenomenon pips)

Similar feelings

Throughout the years, there was discontent among the students. Kinnaird was not popular within Kinnaird, partly because, like most government institutes, the administration was neither interested in improving it nor bothered about people’s opinion. Many of the older staff members still believed Kinnaird to be the best, and lived in oblivion of the modern and private institutes that now perforated in Lahore and attract much of the student cream.

It was however, not as bad as many students thought. Many of these students had started their lines, hoping to become doctors, go abroad or join LUMS but couldn’t. They saw Kinnaird as the outcome of their disappointment and were perpetually depressed or indifferent.

How to socialize with Pakistanis

This is a paragraph  I found interesting in wikitravel.org

"Although Islamabad may look relatively modern, superficially hinting at a Western lifestyle, there are some basic guidelines to keep in mind given the cutural values of Pakistan's society:

• People are very friendly and indeed very good hosts. Many of Islamabad's citizens are well-educated and speak English very well, working for the government and in the private sector. Be gracious in accepting invitations to people's houses for lunch, tea or dinner: it will reflect well on you if you verbally ensure that you are causing them no inconvenience (oho! apnay kwam'kah itna taqaluf kia:P)

• Generally, women do not shake hands with men, though this varies greatly by social class, social setting, age and personal upbringing. A good rule of thumb for both men and women: do not shake hands with members of the opposite sex unless they extend their hands first (in which case it would be rude of you not to shake hands). The best way to greet someone is to nod and say "Assalam-u-alaikum:" smiling always helps!

• Don't consume alcohol in public."

Faiz

The sky was cloudy,cool wind was blowing,we walked nearly half of Mall road to reach lawrence garden's open theater.Faiz Aman maila was going on.Faiz is one of poets whose words have touched my heart.Expecting to learn something deep from a nonconformist poet, what I actually  heard was too much noise and superficial things...but one of the host narrated  her encounter with faiz in these words:

I went to faiz with my mother ,he was sitting on a chair and smoking drowned in thoughts,as if he wasn't present there,I asked him whats the matter and faiz replied :baaz dafa mein apnay ap ko manzar say ghaib kr laita hn.

I liked this angle of faiz's life very much because sometimes I wish that i become invisible and just  observe the people and world without having to say anything,without having to react to an opinion,just pure observation and getting submerged in the moment.

I have a passion for psychology ,to know what people think and how they feel.Its refreshes me.I did not want to get involved with philosophy because having a certain opinion u always have to defend it, not just in front of people but also in front of ur highly critical, guilty charged and furious conscious.Thinking about philosophical questions has pained my heart a lot .I feel exhausted and want to run away from it but I have recently found that  philosophy is an integral part of me,I cant live with it and I cannot run  from it.

Soul and science

''Physical world is the only world that there is , that the mind and brain are inextricably united''

This is the philosophical stance of science.Unlike all other things related to parapsychology or para-physics

the idea of mind or soul is the only one which science is shy to look in the eye. 

Admitting presence of soul is a hard thing for scientists and philosophers who want to see the universe God free.

This matter is more complicated than meets the eye.

My concept of soul:

My definition of  soul is an incorporeal essence of living beings,it is not a physical thing but belongs to spiritual reality.Its properties are different from matter and energy ,so it does not obey the usual laws of physics.
Its only function thats common in all living beings is being able to feel.But in humans soul has another function that is exercise of free will.Being able to choose and direct the energy for action in a particular direction.
The level of consciousness depends on the development of brain and the development of soul is correlated with it.Many higher animals  have consciousness of primitive level and so does they have soul as anybody having a pet cant deny this fact.
Soul is only present in living beings which have the ability to move (this concept has its roots in the fact that consciousness is necessary for voluntary movements) or at least have some kind of sensory system.
Soul needs a body to be born useful.
Every thing present in this world has a spiritual parallel that is attached to it like out body is attached to our mind or soul because if there is a God and He belongs to the spiritual realm then for him to  keep in touch with its creation and control them, there should be a connection between and it necessitates the presence of soul.soul may differ from the spiritual counter part of nonliving beings.

This is my concept of soul and i don't claim it to be truly right.

soul ,free will and problem they pose to science:

According to general scientific  opinion,  it  is  all  matter  and  energy  what 

exists in the universe and we the human body and our brain is part of that energy 

and matter.  The matter can change forms and that is what happens when the 

physical body dies.  This is understandable since the matter and energy interact 

according to the laws of physics and our body must follow those laws--  if  that  is 

what we only are!

By following the above theorem it is at once evident that the human beings 

do not have any free will. Being matter and energy alone they are functioning only 

according to the laws of physics and mathematics. In real life experiences however 

we all observe that  along with  existing  natural  laws  the  free  human  will  too  is 

operational.

For checking free will see this experiment:

free will means 1)what you can do is in your control

                       2) its not determined by somebody else

This logo can be see as green arrows pointing to the right and yellow arrows pointing to the left,exercise your free will and see them in what ever direction you want to see.To see the arrows towards right or towards left its completely up to you.
This is one point that makes us think that we have free will but they are certain other things that need to be explored,which are out of scope of this post.

we cannot control the things that are thrown towards us by the nature but we definitely can choose what responses to show and this fact makes us responsible for our acts.

Continuity of soul:

As far as immortality of soul is considered its totally a matter of faith.People quote near death experiences as proof of it but till now i am critical of them and don't consider them satisfying.

Plus an experiment was conducted in 1915 in which the experimenter showed that weight of the dead dogs got reduced after their death but this experiment is of dubious nature and has been criticized a lot.

Why its so famous

x

pain yourself and get free from guilt

When reminded of a past immoral deed, people want to experience physical pain — and feel pain more intensely — in order to ease their guilt
(Bastion)


Comments:

*pain may be perceived as repayment for sin in three ways

 1) Pain is the embodiment of atonement. Just as physical cleansing washes away sin, physical pain is experienced as a penalty, and paying that penalty reestablishes moral purity. 

2) Subjecting oneself to pain communicates remorse to others (including God) and signals that one has paid for one’s sins, and this removes the threat of external punishment. 

3) tolerating the punishment of pain is a test of one’s virtue, reaffirming one’s positive identity to oneself and others.(epiphenom)

* According to the scientists, although we think of pain as purely physical in nature, in fact we imbue the unpleasant sensation with meaning. Humans have been socialized over ages to think of pain in terms of justice. We equate it with punishment, and as the experimental results suggest, the experience has the psychological effect of re-balancing the scales of justice—and therefore resolving guilt. Whether or not one believes that God works in mysterious ways, it seems that pain is the embodiment of atonement.(flagellation effect)

*CATHOLIC theology says that heaven awaits the pure of heart while hell is reserved for unrepentant sinners. For the sinful but penitent middle, however, there is the option of purgatory—a bit of fiery cleansing before they are admitted to eternal bliss. Nor is inflicting pain to achieve purification restricted to the afterlife. Self-flagellation is reckoned by many here on Earth to be, literally, good for the soul.

*Many religious traditions have pain rituals, and some of them are grotesque. Some Shia Muslims whip themselves with zangirs, whips made of knife blades, until their backs are red with blood. In the Hindu ritual of kavadi, believers use meat hooks and skewers to pierce their legs, face and tongue. In Christianity, “mortification of the flesh” dates back to the original teachings, and practices range from wearing hair shirts and chains to various forms of self-flagellation, even self-castration.

Homeopathy faith and science

Homeopathy is a pefect example to define faith.If you look at the scientific evidence of working of homeopathy, you cannot resist thinking it a big joke.But hold on, a loads of people including me ,my family members ,some of my relatives have seen homeopathy performing miracles.
yes after a month of exortation and steadfastness when after completing a demanding task i fell ill with typhoid(i had been a victim of defective vacination and this typhoid recurred...i had'nt been eating food from 'rehriees').There came a cousin of me practicing homeopathy and he conviced my mother to use homeopathy.Suspectingly she conceded and within a weak or 3 days to be specific  my health was restored.My uncle was suffering from diplopia and no drug was working, at that time homeopathy came to help and  performed its miracle.
This is faith.you have to cross a deep trench,you cant take risk,somebody asks you to take a step forward in space, which you just see  as thin air but you with  confidence in the truth of that person you move ahead and find something beneath your feet and you only realise later that it was a glass bridge that helped you cross.
A homepathic drug treats a disease by using a certain poison or a substance that produces similar symptoms in the body as the disease,that substance is diluted  to such a value that practically not a single pharmcologically active particle can be seen in it.Homeopaths in order to explain this give an explanation without any experimental evidence.They say that the solvent used for dilution is modified in such a way that it contains a memory of that substance.This memory  is more of spiritual kind  then as something with physical evidence.

Homeopaths try to include homeopathy in science but until they remove this element of faith,it cannot be declared as science

Love and Search for an Exalted Being

"Of the natural conditions of man is his search after an Exalted Being towards Whom he has an inherent attraction. This is manifested by an infant from the moment of its birth. As soon as it is born, it displays a spiritual characteristic that it inclines towards its mother and is inspired by love of her. As its faculties are developed and its nature begins to display itself openly, this inherent quality is displayed more and more strongly. It finds no comfort anywhere except in the lap of its mother. If it is separated from her and finds itself at a distance from her its life becomes bitter. Heaps of bounties fail to beguile it away from its mother in whom all its joy is concentrated. It feels no joy apart from her.

What, then, is the nature of the attraction which an infant feels so strongly towards its mother ?

It is the attraction which the True Creator has implanted in the nature of man. The same attraction comes into play whenever a person feels love for another. It is a reflection of the attraction that is inherent in man’s nature towards God, as if he is in search of something that he misses, the name of which he has forgotten and which he seeks to find in one thing or another which he takes up from time to time. A person’s love of wealth or offspring or wife or his soul being attracted towards a musical voice are all indications of his search for the True Beloved.

As man cannot perceive with his physical eyes the Imperceptible Being Who is latent in everyone like fire and yet is hidden from everyone, nor can he find Him through the exercise of his imperfect reason, he has been subject to many errors in his understanding of Him and through his errors he renders to others that which is His due. God Almighty has mentioned an excellent illustration in the Holy Qur’an that the world is like a great hall paved smooth with slabs of glass and a current of water flows underneath them which runs very fast. A person looking at the slabs of glass wrongly imagines them to be water also and is afraid of walking upon them as he would be afraid of walking upon water, though in reality they are only glass but very clear and transparent. Thus, these great objects in heaven like the sun and the moon etc. are transparent like glass and are worshipped by mistake. Behind them, there is a Higher Power at work which is flowing swiftly like water. It is the mistake of those who worship created things that they attribute to the glass all this activity which is being manifested by the Power behind it. This is the explanation of the verse:

اِنَّهٗ صَرْحٌ مُّمَرَّدٌ مِّنْ قَوَارِيْرَ‌

‘It is a great hall paved with smooth slabs of glass.’ (Al Surah An-Naml 27:45)

As the Being of God Almighty, despite its brightness, is hidden beyond sight, the physical universe is not adequate for its true recognition. This is the reason why those who depended upon the physical system despite their careful consideration of its perfect orderliness which comprehends hundreds of wonders within itself, and despite their pursuit of astronomy and physics and philosophy to a degree which shows that they had penetrated through heaven and earth, could not get rid of their doubts and suspicions and became involved in all types of errors and wandered far afield in their absurd fantasies. Many of them become involved in grave errors and wander far away in pursuit of their stupid fancies. Their utmost conjecture is that this grand system which displays great wisdom must have a Maker, but this conjecture is incomplete and this insight is defective. The affirmation that this system must have a creator does not amount to a positive affirmation that He does in truth exist."(A passage i liked in a book)

which is powerful: love or fear

"Shatter open my skull pour in it the wine of madness, o'my God this is my humble request.The wine you termed as sharaban tahoora,which will intoxicate me with love and blind me of fear  and free me of all my worries , keeping my rational vision intact,strengthening it and making it more clear instead."
The most wonderful feeling I have ever felt in my life is  love.But to term love as a single emotion is no justice.It not only comprises of want but also of excitement to meet ,to talk or just to be in the company of your beloved.It consists of fear of losing them.It consists of readiness to sacrifice for that person . Feeling of hollowness in its absence.
Love is what we all humans search for,somebody to whom we can show our wounds,share our pleasant and unpleasant experiences and hope for consolation.
But what is that when we are unable to stand for the cause or person we love because of our fears or distracting desires or difficult conditions.Does that mean that we don't love that person or that despite being the most wonderful experience love is not the most potent force.
I don't think its like any of them,its like a war in which sometimes love and sometime its anti forces  dominate.Fear is one of the worst enemies of love.But wars are not won with a single strike of sword.If the love is true,it will keep fueling  the passion to fight.Many a times that person will lose.Then again he will lose.But only the one who will endure with patience all these frustrations of losing will succeed.Here the will power comes into play.Not to lose hope and keep striving.